[18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:50 am

Sam smirked. "Thanks," he said smug, taking it as a compliment. He knew he was smart, all things considered, and it was one of the few things he believed he had going for him. Dean had always encouraged him to be smart, taught him so much too. Their Dad hadn't stunted him either but once he was older he had wanted him to focus less on school. Dean, on the other hand, had made sure he got to school and even helped him study sometimes.

He nodded, satisfied with the answer. John wasn't like that. Their Dad kept busy, never letting things get slow if he could help it, and always looked for a new case. They had times where they rented places for a few months so they could go to school but as they got older there were less times of that. And John had left them when he couldn't take him with him of course.

"Alright. You can have the couch, if you want. No need to waste any money you got on a motel room. But if you use any dishes, don't just leave them in the sink, k?" He gave his brother a pointed look. "And no cans in the fucking microwave." He did not care for the place to explode.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:51 am

Of course Sam took it as a compliment, just like Dean meant it. Dean hadn't had much luck in school himself, but he'd done what he could to get his brother through with the best grades possible. And his brother had always had an uncanny ability to figure out the real meaning of his words beneath his all-inclusive layer of sarcasm. At times it was annoying, since sometimes Dean hadn't wanted to talk about it, but it was good to know that there would always be someone that would know exactly what he really meant, even if he didn't like it at times.

Dean nodded along with Sam's list of house rules, and couldn't help a laugh at the final one, a real laugh rather than a polite one. "Just once," he teased with a grin. "For science, Sammy." He snorted at a memory. "Like that time we dumped, like, three packs of Mentos into that two-liter bottle of Coke and shook it up and down to see what would happen." And by 'we' he most definitely meant 'I', as was usual during their childhood. Sam had mostly been there as an observer, as always. When John had gotten back to find mints and soda sprayed all across the yard outside of the house they'd been renting, his face had been equal parts curious and semi-traumatized.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:51 am

Sam had pulled away a lot, had grown distant, when he became a teenager. He was well aware of that and why. But they still had always been able to communicate in their own special way. Sometimes just a look spoke a thousand words between them. Even their father got exasperated when they seemed to speak monosyllables and have an entire conversation he didn't understand. And it just seemed like they always understood each other. They were best friends for a long time.

"Fuck science," he said firmly at his brother. "I swear I will ban you from all things in the kitchen if you do it." His brother was prone to making things explode. He liked it and fire. In their line of work it was easy to get his fix but Sam would appreciate it if he kept the explosions away from him kitchenware. Sam rolled his eyes. "Okay, that had been fun. When I was twelve." And sixteen. "But no explosions. I'll end up forfeiting the deposit if you blow something up."
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:51 am

Their way of communicating had been unique to them, as far as Dean knew. He liked it, even if it drove everyone around them crazy that they could have entire conversations with just a few words. That was part of the fun and the appeal, truth be told. And of course, seeing the faces of people seeing them doing it for the first time always made Dean snicker. Sam and he had something special, and maybe it was weird, but it was theirs and Dean would have fought for it tooth and nail if anyone had protested.

Dean huffed at his brother's initial reaction. When Sam rolled his eyes, though, he knew exactly what was coming and couldn't help a smug grin. "Hey, now. Twelve or not, that was a lot of fun." Not to mention the look on their father's face. Dean was sure he'd never forget it. Sam continued to insist that he keep the explosions to a maximum of zero, though, and he sighed. "Fine," he agreed, pouting as much as he thought he could get away with. "Although I'm sure I could manage to pay back the deposit if an accident happened. Which it won't, of course."
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:51 am

"Sure sure." He had just admitted it was fun so he wasn't going to take it back when his brother would tease him. He huffed and moved to take off his socks and stretch out, knocking his feet against his brother's knee.

"Get the door," he told him, just as someone knocked. He could see them come over through the curtains. "I paid debit so just give them some tip."

Once the pizzas were inside, and Sam waved at the guy he recognized, Sam turned slightly so he was still stretched but still leaving space for Dean. The pizza smelled good and he realized he was hungry. The croissant earlier hadn't done anything apparently. Sometimes he was surprised at how much his body demanded but both being tall and using magic expanded more energy. And he'd done some simple spells this morning.

Not bothering with plates or napkins, he put his pizza box in his lap, and took out a slice. Folding it in half, he took a large bite. When he swallowed it, he spoke up. "You can get us drinks if you want." He was more preoccupied with the pizza.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:51 am

"Yeah, got it," Dean answered. He dug into his jeans for a five-dollar bill and handed it to the delivery guy with a 'thank you'. "I swear I haven't eaten in days, this smells so good." He'd eaten a pretty big breakfast, actually, but of course Sam didn't need to know that. He looked healthy and well-fed enough that Sam would know he was joking. And the pizzas did smell amazing.

Fortunately Sam wasn't standing on protocol. "Drinks, got it." Dean leaned over the back of the couch to snatch a piece as he went into the kitchen. He got them both sodas and walked back to the living room. "California food really has something going for it. Scootch over," he told him, getting another piece. There was more than enough room for both of them, but Dean had always pestered his brother and wasn't about to stop doing so now. Popping the tab on his soda, he took a long sip before setting it on the table. It felt good to be doing this again, eating right out of the box like they had when they were kids and John was gone on a hunt. They'd done this several times while growing up, finding some random movie and staying up as late as possible. It had been one of the most enjoyable pasttimes they'd had.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:51 am

Sam sat back against the arm rest and ate his slice, enjoying it since he hadn't ordered any from there in a few months. Usually he ate at home, now, just simple things. Since he was on vacation, he had more time open.

He moved just a tad, but knew Dean had plenty of space, so didnt move far. He took his drink, opening the tab, and drinking some after the last bite. Then, he ate the crust of his slice. Putting the soda to sit against him balanced, he grabbed another slice to eat.

He waited for his brother to get into the pizza he had a few slices in. "They're actually an all organic, vegan bread type place. The meats real but they have other options," he told him. Like the one he had on his lap, the Greek pizza. And yet it tasted damn good. Even he had his reservations, because he wasn't a vegetarian or anything, but the food tasted amazing.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:52 am

His brother didn't bother moving very far but Dean didn't care. Since he'd mostly eaten in Baby or greasy diners for the last few years, almost always on his own he couldn't complain about either the location or the company. And Sam beat any other hunter by a long shot.

Dean made a vaguely disgruntled I've-been-betrayed sound. "All organic?" he repeated through a mouthful of pizza. "That sounds really weird. Is this what happens when you go to college? Eugh." He didn't really have anything against eating healthy, he just preferred to eat the stuff that tasted good. Regardless of it potentially steering him closer to the early grave he was probably going to be in. Still, it was fun to tease Sam about stuff, whether he cared about it or not. People would probably find it weird that they bickered so much considering the fact that Dean had never once let anyone else talk about his brother like that. Dean couldn't help it - Sam was his brother. Huffing, he reached for another piece of pizza.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:52 am

Sam snorted, making a face when Dean spoke with his mouth full. He knocked his knee with a foot. "Dude. Don't talk with your mouth full, eugh." He wrinkled his nose. "And no. Cali is just full of hippies, to be honest." Even he wasn't quite that bad, even if he did get influenced by the crowd.

"But I'm not complaining. It's good and less preservatives," he told him.

Eating another few slices, he closed the box and put it on the floor beside the couch, taking a swig of his soda. He leaned back, closing his eyes, and sighed.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:52 am

Dean snorted at Sam's classification of California as a hippie state. No wonder he'd been growing his hair out and wearing a beanie. He'd have to draw the line at dreadlocks and flower crowns, though, brotherly love or not. Sam wasn't exactly the type for that, however.

"I'm pretty sure the point of preservatives is so that you'll look good when the zombie apocalypse happens and you're clawing out of your coffin," Dean pointed out. That was wildly inaccurate, but he didn't care. Sarcasm was the universal language of even those who were not related. "Does taste good, though."
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:52 am

Sam blinked at his brother's joke and shook his head in amusement. "Um..I don't even wanna know where you came up with that one..did you fight a Paris Hilton zombie?" His father had a zombie hunt once, or so he said, but Sam didn't believe him at the time.

"It is. I like the Thai place nearby best but they charge up the ass," he told him. He let out a soft groan as he stretched, toes curling against the floor as he straightened up so he wasn't laying down anymore.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:52 am

"That is the one thing we do not talk about," Dean said, shaking his head tragically. He'd taken out a couple flesh-chompers but he didn't know if they'd been zombies or something else. They were eating people and that was good enough for him to come in and take them out. "And you need to appreciate my humour more." He poked Sam in the ribs to demonstrate his point. "You found a Thai place you like?" Dean asked, raising an eyebrow. He couldn't even remember the last time he'd had something like that. "We're so getting some."
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:53 am

Sam snorted. Of course not. He squirmed away a bit at his brother's poke, ticklish. "No thanks. I might lose IQ points if I let that happen, Mr. Accidents don't happen accidentally," he said, remembering him saying that at some point. Which..well. Was fucking funny but still. Ridiculous.

He nodded. "Yeah, alright. Tomorrow." It'd be worth splurging on since it was fantastic. In the mean time, Sam waved towards the TV. "We can watch a movie or something. Unless you wanna do something else?" They hadn't hung out in a long time but it wasn't awkward. He could almost think that things never changed between them.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:53 am

The way Sam squirmed away had Dean pretty sure his brother was ticklish. For an older brother, that was very important information. "Accidents don't happen accidentally!" Dean protested. "Unless they're actually accidents." He gave him a grin clearly meant to be as annoying as his words.

"Yeah, tomorrow sounds good." He followed the direction of Sam's hand wave and nodded. "Doesn't matter to me. It wasn't too long of a drive and I haven't been doing anything the last few days, so..." He shrugged. While he'd usually been the one who preferred to go out at night with friends, he certainly didn't know anyone in California, present company aside.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:53 am

Sam scowled. "Then they do happen accidently because they're accidents!" He facepalmed at his brother's ridiculous grin. He knew he wasn't being serious but Sam couldn't help but bug him about it either. It was little brother's prerogative.

"Hm. Princess Bride?" It was a favorite of both of theirs. He moved over to the DVD stand and plucked it out, turning the TV on and whatnot, kneeling on the floor. He glanced over his shoulder at Dean. "If you want, I can show you around sometime this weekend. I have grading and a meeting tomorrow evening with my boss, though. After that I'm free till Monday."
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:53 am

Dean couldn't help a laugh at his brother's reply. "You never know," he murmured. They'd both pestered each other all through their childhood. John had been sure that they would drive each other crazy, but usually any arguments that cropped up lasted all of five minutes. While Dean had hardly been the mature one of them, he'd generally been the one to admit he was wrong first when it came to an impasse between them.

"Princess Bride? Hell yeah." Dean couldn't even remember the first time they'd watched it. Growing up, it had been a go-to film for both of them. He nodded as Sam suggested plans for the weekend. "Sounds good. I don't have anything, so it's up to you what we do."
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:53 am

There were probably only a handful of fights that were serious between them and they were usually Sam's fault. He could admit that he was a stubborn and whiny teenager a lot of the time. He'd been used Dean giving him what he wanted and never needed to fight with him on most things. They always got along except for when Dean took John's side, usually when it came to moving to a new place, but Sam hadn't resented Dean for it till they were much older. And he couldn't very well stay mad at him very long.

Putting in the movie, he pressed play, and moved to sit back on the couch. He grabbed his drink to finish the rest with slow sips and watched the opening credits.

"Alright. We'll plan something out." He didn't know if he would invite any friends or not but a few of them did ask about Dean. He didn't talk about his home life very much, though, although some of them new he was a hunter before. The civilians he kept things a secret barely knew anything about him.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:53 am

"Do I get to share embarrassing childhood stories?" Dean teased, reaching for his soda. He had no idea if Sam had even told anyone he'd had a brother, although he couldn't blame him if he had kept a blackout status on his former life as far as sharing with his friends went. If he had friends, which wasn't something Dean doubted. While he'd been the popular one, Sam had managed to make plenty of his own friends with some kind of natural ability or something that Dean hadn't been able to figure out. He'd been glad for it, though, especially when it hit their teenage years and Dean had been the undeniable favourite with the majority. A couple times he had, admittedly, left his brother behind in the pursuit of some chick, but he only did it because he figured his brother would be okay.

Still, whenever things happened to Sam, Dean had always been the first one on the scene. He'd been there when Sam first got injured on a hunt and with the problems of his first break-up. Until Sam had left, they'd been a practically inseparable team. As far as Dean was concerned, since Sam wasn't mad at him, the disappearance had just been an extended vacation that had prompted a lot of emotions. Finding his brother happy and healthy was enough.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:53 am

Sam huffed. "No," he said firmly. He was not going to give him permission for anything like that and Dean knew it. Of course it didn't stop his brother from doing it anyway but Sam wouldn't ever agree to it. His friends wouldn't let him live it down if they heard anything really embarrassing. And Dean had plenty of stories, he was sure.

Turning away from his brother, he turned his focus to the movie. He watched quietly, laughing in the funny parts, and mostly smiling through it. Eventually, he grabbed his pizza box, and started eating again. By the time the movie was over he had finished his entire box of Greek pizza.

He shoved the box on the floor again and looked over at Dean as the credit rolled. "That never gets old, huh?"
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:54 am

Dean snickered at his brother's definitive refusal. He hadn't been expecting anything else, but that wasn't going to keep his mouth shut. At least that probably meant that Sam had let people knew he had a brother. Longstanding and deep-rooted relationship or not, Dean would have been admittedly put out at Sam keeping him a secret, even if he did have a reason. Not that Dean would have mentioned that, but it would have been there all the same. Just because he'd been bragging a little on Sammy going to college didn't mean his brother would have done anything like it.

He could hardly believe his brother managed to eat an entire box of pizza by himself. Dean had quite the appetite himself at times, especially when he was going through growth spurts during his teen years, but he would have been hard pressed to manage that much. "Yeah, never," he agreed. "We annoyed the hell out of Dad watching that so many times, I bet." John hadn't been the most motherly of parents, but as soon as one of his boys got sick with something, Princess Bride was pulled out with the cough meds.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:54 am

He didn't talk much about his past for the first few years of school. Hell, he still kind of didn't, because he was a private person. But some friends did know that he had a falling out with his family, that his older brother helped raise him. A few knew about his mom dying when he was young. That was truly about it, except Max, his brother, and maybe Cady. They were the only people who knew a bit more about his childhood because they had helped him come to terms with his powers. The other witches they knew, didn't know all the details either.

"I"m pretty sure even he could quote the entire thing, because we watched it so much as kids," he said with snort. Their Dad had put up with plenty of watching it over the years despite it not being one of his own favorites.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:54 am

Dean chuckled. "Yeah, I bet he could." John hadn't been the best father, but Dean knew he'd managed as well as he could. Some days were worse than others, especially when their mother was somehow brought up or he saw something that reminded John of her. And of course the fact that sometimes he was gone overnight, or even for days at a time, had made Dean angry when he was a kid. But all in all it could have been worse.

Occasional failings aside, John had tried, and that was all Dean could really have asked of him. He and Sam had turned out okay in the end, anyway, even if Dean had had as much of a hand in raising his brother as John did. Of course the two boys hadn't always been the easiest to raise, but Dean had usually been able to straighten out whatever their dad couldn't. Actual problems had been few and far between for the most part.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:54 am

Sam hadn't had the same out look to their childhood that he did now growing up. He'd been a bitter, resentful, and tormented teenager about absolutely everything. And that wasn't really all his fault, because John hadn't made it easy, and his own issues hadn't either. But he could admit now that he was older, that John had done his best, and he had given both his father and brother a hard time. He loved his family, at the end of the day, despite any falling out on his part.

Moving over to take the movie out, he left the TV and moved to pick up any garbage they had lying around. "I'll bring you some stuff for you to sleep with. Get your bags and stuff from the car, if you want. You can have a shower," he offered. "The water pressure is pretty decent." And his bathroom was clean, which he knew Dean would appreciate. Motel bathrooms weren't always up to the best standards.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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LadyLizard
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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:54 am

"Good water pressure? Awesome." Dean had always been truly appreciative of a good shower system, which made it hard to be on the road sometimes. He found his jacket where he'd left it in a pile on the kitchen counter and dug around in the pockets until he found his keys. "Be right back," he yelled to wherever Sam was in the house.

It only took him a minute to get his stuff out of the car, since he didn't carry around anything but the necessities. There was a cardboard box with his name at it back at Bobby's place, but considering the fact he didn't know what he was going to run into on the road, it was safer to only carry what he could keep in a duffel bag. He had a picture of him, Sam, and their dad in his wallet, but that was about the only truly personal thing he had besides Baby. The rest were just clothes and weapons, apart from a few other essentials.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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Re: [18+] I'm trying, but I'm graceless [mxm] don't have the sunny side to face this [/r]

Post by LadyLizard » Thu Aug 17, 2017 4:54 am

Sam nodded, knowing how important that was to him, and headed into the bathroom to wash his teeth and pee while Dean grabbed his stuff. He wet his face and finished up after a few minutes. He came out and liked for Dean.

"There's a spare toothbrush on the sink if you need it. I'm sure your hygiene hasn't improved," he said with a smirk. Despite that, he knew his brother was a drama queen about cleaning up, except for two flaws Sam hated the most. Dirty dishes and socks. But considering they didn't do much laundry on the road it made sense his sock would stick.

Which reminded him. "And if you need to do laundry, go ahead, but if you dry after 2 am I will stab you. The dryer is loud and it's near my window." He grimaced. One of the few things hated about the place.

He moved to his room, letting Dean do what he wanted, and went to grab the linens for him for the couch. He got him an extra pillow too. Dropping that on the couch, Sam went back to his own room to get rid of his clothes. He put on a pair of PJ pants and didn't bother with anything else. Not even underwear because he hated when he got hot in his sleep.

While Dean showered, Sam cleaned up the rest of the kitchen, since he'd left a mess from breakfast and hadn't bothered to clean it.
When I was a child, I heard voices...
Some would sing and some would scream.
You soon find you have few choices...
I learned the voices died with me.

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