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 Subject: [HP AU] Fool the whole world, just until I get better [jay/18+]

PostPosted: April 29th, 2017, 11:46 pm 

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Life with Sirius was difficult and annoying and maddening. He snored whether he was human or dog. They both knew that dog Sirius understood every word that was said to him, especially when Remus wanted him to get off, for fuck's sake. And of course it was like having a walking garbage disposal in the house, and no food was safe until it was eaten.

Yet life without Sirius was... heartbreaking. Full moon nights - no, weeks - were abhorrent. It all hurt and there was nobody capable of helping him through the transformation or the long night as an inhuman. And the day after, he had to stumble around and deal with a shaking, scratched up body that just wanted to collapse. Public opinion on his kind, or him in particular, were no better than they ever had been.

But there was also the far more emotional aspect. After a long day, there was no beloved annoyance to meet him at the door. He couldn't kiss him or breathe in his scent or just lay in bed and feel him. It was never possible to just reach over and hear a snuggly, sleepy whine if he woke the other up. Stormy nights weren't spent counting the seconds between bolts of lightning. There were no day trips or museum visits.

When he heard the first weird story that suggested Sirius might not have been dead, he'd believed it wholeheartedly for about five seconds. And then the cold denial had fully set in and Remus had refused to even think about believing it. His Sirius was dead and there was no way that that could ever change. He just had to process that and grieve... and so far he'd done neither. All he'd really done was somehow managed to fuck up the little of his life that hadn't already been destroyed.

A couple other of the Order members had stopped by to check on him a couple times. He had mostly refused to have anything to do with him. Fortunately about half of their visits had been checkups after the full moon and it gave him every reason to kick them out. But unfortunately that also meant that he had to go lay in an empty bed and wish there was a warm, heavy body there next to him.

For a brief time, he'd considered trying to get some kind of help. But he'd quickly abandoned the notion. Was he supposed to say that he, a gay werewolf rebel fighter from a working class family, had been in love with a gay trans rebel fighter from wizarding pseudo-royalty? Not a story that he could explain even if it was a history that had been his to share. Sure, he had no problem telling bits of his own part. Sirius' story was his alone, though. Even in death, he couldn't imagine betraying him like that.

It all still really hurt. Remus had been sulking at home for the last... several months, really. Things had gone from worse to even worse, somehow, and he still hadn't really figured out how. And of course it had been the something-month anniversary of Sirius dying which had just made him feel even more horrible. So now, some six weeks later, he was still sulking and still hiding and still doing a million other things that he shouldn't be.

He did kind of feel justified though. It wasn't often that he turned things around to make them about himself. The number of times he'd done so could be counted on one hand. But Sirius had abandoned him. Left him to a life that Remus didn't at all enjoy. And while the Order and the War kept him busy, they couldn't take care of everything. An enormous hole had been left in his life and tying to murder himself by work wasn't exactly cutting it. But unfortunately there were a couple travel restrictions thanks to his little cosmetic problem.

Still, he felt restless. Like he needed to change something, and desperately. But he just didn't know what. How did you know who or what needed to change? Remus had just given up on figuring that out and had skipped to the 'lonely hermit drinking on the moors'. Clearly he should pick up bad life habits instead of keeping his good ones. Or, well, his okayish ones. So far he had mostly managed to keep up appearances, but...



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PostPosted: April 30th, 2017, 8:44 pm 

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For all the months he'd spent living in a cave, held up in Grimmuald Place, or the horrible years in Azkaban, Sirius had to admit that he was by far the most uncomfortable when he was in the dark. Despite his pension for trying to hide in small spaces in his dog form (which James teased him for to no end) he wasn't interested in romping through the night anywhere any longer. He felt vulnerable in dark shacks he found residency in and the thought of going anywhere near a forest sent him into a considerable amount of panic. It was a little ironic, considering he'd first shifted into a dog in a forest, and spent a considerable amount of time there with Moony.

Mostly, he just didn't care to be alone.

So spending time in a Scottish forest? Not his idea of fun. It was too bad that he didn't have his wand or he wouldn't need to travel about 100 miles to be somewhere familiar. Then again, he was probably one of the only people who thought that the Scotland Highlands were familiar. There wasn't really anything he could do unless he wanted to steal so he could travel. Not that he was against the idea, but when you were traveling from forest to forest, there were very few opportunities to do so.

---

After 15 days, only stopping when he was exhausted, and needed to eat or sleep, he finally made it somewhere familiar. Only a few miles from Hogsmeade and Hogwarts, Sirius sped up as much as he could, legs shaking by the time he landed near the outskirts of the back of the school. Tongue lolling, he trotted down towards the greenhouses, bypassing the usual school charms that Sprout had on them easily, and squirming his way into the patch of edible flowers and fruit grown there for ages.

He filled his stomach until he felt like he could burst and then found a cool patch of dirt to curl up in behind some large trees. He barely noticed when he passed out.

--
The bustle of Sprout coming to work in the main greenhouse next door woke him. He tensed, pulled out of his dreams (which weren't very pleasant anyway), and remembered where he was. Making sure he wasn't seen, Sirius ran out of the greenhouse, towards the double doors of Hogwarts. Thankfully there were only a few kids hanging around early, and most of them were too sleepy to care that a large dog had gotten on the premises. He barely managed to contain his excitement when he found the stairs and started the long trek up to the seventh floor. He needed to find Harry.


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PostPosted: April 30th, 2017, 9:27 pm 

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Remus had been reluctant to accept Dumbledore's invitation to teach at Hogwarts. There were a million and one concerns he had, and he spent an entire day writing out a list of everything that could possibly go wrong and had sent it in reply. Dumbledore answered saying that if there was anything that could go wrong now that hadn't in his childhood, he'd look into it, but otherwise he was a bit busy to read such a long and detailed missive. Since he could come up with no other obstructions, he'd given in and packed his things. It had taken all of an hour to clean out his home.

Being back at the school with all his friends dead was strange. Sure, he'd known Dumbledore when he was young, but the Marauders and several of the other people they'd known as kids had died since then. Most important among the dead were Sirius and James and Lily, but it wasn't as if he was glad any of them were dead... except maybe Peter, and even that was harsh.

The semester started off smoothly but he didn't start feeling like he fit in. Although it seemed like the kids all liked him pretty well. Probably only because of the chocolate he handed out in every class. Wasn't much else to commend him to anyone, much less a bunch of teenagers. Problems arose infrequently and were generally dealt with quickly. Overall, it was nice to be on the faculty side of things, and he enjoyed it.

Of course, he had no idea when that was due to change. The day had started normally and continued that way until the second class of the day. Evidently someone had found a werewolf on school grounds in wolf form. Remus had put an end to that and barely held back his eyeroll. Every time a stray dog wandered around, people started clamouring about there being a werewolf pack in the Forbidden Forest. He knew firsthand that there was nothing there, he'd checked. But evidently a large canine had been seen going upstairs, by people who were willing to admit it looked like an ordinary dog.

"Probably chased some cats and ate some scraps before it wandered back out," he assured the class. But then of course someone insisted that it was a Grim and someone was going to die by lunchtime. Around that point Remus wondered how any of them would get to adulthood if they were so gullible. Well, he and his friends had been just as bad when they were this lot's age. And then the reports were that Harry Potter had finally gone insane. Remus checked with Madame Pomfrey that Harry hadn't actually gone crazy and then sat back and let the rumour mill run wild. Clearly he couldn't do a thing.

Evidently there had been some kind of excitement that morning surrounding Harry, but Dumbledore himself had asked for zero details shared. He had also said that Harry was completely fine and that there was nothing to worry about. Remus wasn't so sure about that but Ron Weasley seemed confident that while Harry was missing, he was fine. So he decided to send a note to the headmaster requesting he be kept up on things due to his relationship with James and went back to his classes.

Surprisingly, nobody had gotten more than a papercut by lunchtime. Dumbledore had in fact gotten back to him and informed him that Harry had been feeling excitable earlier, had no lingering negative effects, and would be around to see him later. There was some news regarding a family member of his that had created some disturbances but everything had been settled as needed. He asked Remus to call on him after lunch but was quite firm that the lunch period itself should go undisturbed.

He decided to eat in his room since he had the next two periods off and his room was closer to Dumbledore's office than the teacher's lounge. Once he was done eating, he could get some papers taken care of in peace and not have to stick around downstairs all day. The students tended to show up at his door if they needed him. So when someone knocked, he assumed it was a kid and got up to answer it without bothering to ask who it was through the two-inch-thick wooden door. He'd been about to finish up and go meet with Dumbledore, but this wouldn't take long to finish if it was a student. Otherwise he could just explain his prior engagement and offer to take it up again later.

Upon seeing his dead lover's face, Remus immediately slammed the door shut and stood there with his palms pressed against it like that would stop an angry ghost. Well, there was one way to find out if the man was real or not. Jerking open the door after only a few seconds, he punched Remus squarely in the mouth before slamming it closed again and freaking out. Oh god, whoever was out there was real. It wasn't a ghost. Wait, hold the fuck up, it wasn't a ghost! He'd just punched Sirius in the face for literally no reason at all.

Coming to that conclusion made him yank the door open again. This time he just stood there and stared at him, looking half confused and half batshit insane. He couldn't decide on whether to ask 'how' or 'why' so he just mumbled a half-understandable "Alive?" That was the important thing, though he really wasn't sure what he would do if he got a negative answer to that question. It wasn't like he would want to tell anybody he was hallucinating his dead lover. Nobody needed to know that.



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PostPosted: April 30th, 2017, 9:48 pm 

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Considering the last time they had reunited, he had been received with a hug (after the initial moment of suspicion), he hadn't expected to be punched in greeting. To say he wasn't ready would be an understatement.

He'd spent all morning and afternoon with Dumbledore, after a joyous meeting with Harry. Of course the old man didn't believe him nearly as quickly as Harry did, and he was put to the test. He understood why, once it was explained that they had presumed him dead, and that it had been month since he'd disappeared.

He didn't have very many answers for them but apparently he sufficiently proved he was the real Sirius because he was let out of the Headmaster's office. Dumbledore seemed more interested in making sure Harry didn't stick around more than sending him off that wretched house so he was taking full advantage of it. Harry mentioned Remus was here, which was a surprise, considering his werewolf status having been revealed, but he was quite happy to know he was nearby.

It didn't take long to find and follow his lover's scent and he rocked back on his heels when he found his door. He was wearing what he'd been wearing when he went through the veil but he was mussed up and dirty. Otherwise, he mostly had large bags under his eyes, but looked better than when he had escaped Azkaban.

Remus packed a good wallop, so once the initial surprise and pain ebbed, Sirius cradled his face. He was stopped from knocking again when the door opened and it was clear Remus felt like he was seeing a ghost.

The question made Sirius shrug, hesitant to move forward in case he was hit again. Their relationship had been rocky at best since Azkaban and coming back from presumed death didn't help his case.

"Never realized I was dead in the first place," he informed him, eyeing him. Despite looking healthier, being able to feed himself in Hogwarts, Remus looked a little frayed around the edges.


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PostPosted: April 30th, 2017, 10:07 pm 

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Remus wouldn't have been at all surprised if Sirius had knocked another time or three on his door even if he'd gotten punched every time. It would have been a bad idea, but still. The exact kind of bad idea that he would have done, from childhood to now. No use in saying they didn't know each other. Sirius knew how to pester Remus and Remus knew how to get him to get himself into trouble. Although punching someone in the jaw hurt both parties and he wasn't really interested in doing that again.

He was just glad he looked less like a homeless person than he had before returning to the school. Sure, he still looked horrible and like he was one meal and one patch from being starving and naked. But at least he wasn't actually actively starving and had a bed to sleep in at night. It was better than both of them had had at many times in the past. For once, Sirius didn't look too perfectly clean himself, despite his usual tendency to dress nicely. Remus had always looked like a hobo but his lover at least had some fashion sense.

It would have been really nice if he'd gotten a better answer than a shrug from Sirius, but he wasn't sure if talking was in the cards. For either of them, truth be told, because he wasn't sure he could speak again. It was all kind of overwhelming. And nothing about this situation was something that he could reason out or research or any other of his habits when confronted with a problem. Sirius had always tossed all those methods out the window even before he'd died or been imprisoned or anything else. Remus had no idea what to do with this.

Sirius' eventual verbal reply got him to nod once, still looking shell-shocked. He knew it was Sirius, didn't have to get any of the proofs that Harry or Dumbledore would have required. The other man's scent told him everything he needed to know, and there was a kind of presence that his lover had always had that just made Remus feel safe. And all of that was coming together, which had honestly tempered his reaction a tiny bit. There would probably be a complete emotional crash in a couple hours but for now he was half happy and half dissociating in a sense. Suspended disbelief and voila, Remus was able to accept that Sirius was alive.

And since he had no desire to punch anyone any more, there was one clear option that didn't include personal or property damage. Remus abandoned everything but his instincts and stepped forward to hug Sirius. He wanted to press his face in his neck and tangle his hand in his hair and press his body against his and just feel. Feel him breathing and the warmth of his body. Give the world a little bit of time without them and let himself believe that the other man was here and alive and physically healthy.

But they were definitely going to talk about this later. Sirius got a stay of execution for the moment because Remus had to work out how he felt about him being alive again beyond 'relieved' and 'shocked'. And once he decided that, he was probably just going to want to not let go for the rest of the day. Dumbledore's meeting would have to wait and his last two classes would have to be in the charge of his TA. For now he just wanted to get an explanation, turn his brain off, and spend some one-on-one time with someone he'd thought was dead.



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PostPosted: April 30th, 2017, 10:18 pm 

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Remus seemed to exude "don't come near me" with pretty much everyone else. Sirius learned early on that it was simply a perpetual bubble of fear to let people get close though. He was one of the only people who disregarded it and just went out of his way to make physical contact with Remus. It wasn't as if lycanthropy would be passed with touch, no matter the horror stories people told each other.

And Sirius had never been against affection, moreso once he found people he actually cared to be affectionate with (his blood family certainly didn't count).

A heavy sense of relief settled over him when Remus hugged him. Lots of questions went unanswered, Sirius felt exhausted beyond belief both physically and mentally, but this was probably the only thing other than Harry that could ground him. Wrapping his own arms around Remus, he closed his eyes, and tucked his face into his neck.


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PostPosted: April 30th, 2017, 10:30 pm 

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Remus remembered how much he'd once hated Sirius for being so nonchalant about disobeying his supposed desire to be left alone. But like most mad schemes the animagus came up with, it had paid off somehow. And Remus couldn't even imagine his life without his jackass love. It just didn't make sense. Neither did their current situation either, but still. Their lives had always been pretty weird.

The fact that Sirius didn't try to return the punch relieved him. But that was nothing compared to the feeling when the other man not only let him hug him but hugged back. Remus wrapped an arm around his waist and the other around his shoulders, just trying to touch as much of him as he could. He buried his face in Sirius' shirt, taking deep breaths of it like he could somehow fix the scent more firmly in his mind. It had been something that was impossible to forget but he couldn't dare take that chance.

And of course everything crashed into him at once and he started crying. It wasn't pretty by any means, just a raw release of emotion, but he hadn't planned on doing it. Chances were he'd feel better once he was done though. That was how such things usually went. Plus he didn't cry often so the difference in his emotional state was noticeable.



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PostPosted: April 30th, 2017, 10:40 pm 

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He had come to terms by now that losing people was unavoidable. Especially during times of war. Once Lily and James died it was hard not to question mortality. And Remus had his own expiration date, far less likely to live as long as humans did because of his condition. It wasn't something he liked to think about but he knew it was a possibility.

He never really thought of what his own death would mean though. Maybe it was selfish but he figured everyone was probably going to be better off. He was reckless, damaged goods. And they weren't kids anymore. Remus had more people around him now. He had Harry.

Seeing Harry's reaction at realizing he was alive, brought him up short to be quite honest. Remus' reaction doubly so. It was..nice, knowing he was missed. It was just surprising is all.

He tightened his own grip around his lover's shoulder, swallowing back his own emotions when he realized Moony was crying. He never did that, if anyone was prone to being emotional, it was Sirius.

Aware that they were half out in the hallway, Sirius moved them forward into the room, and kicked the door closed. "Hey, Moony. Shh. It's alright." He grabbed a fistful of his robes and held onto him as he let it out. "M'sorry, Remus. I'm sorry."


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PostPosted: May 1st, 2017, 7:49 am 

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Remus would definitely have at least smacked Sirius upside the head if the topic of him not being missed came up. Yes, yes he would be missed. Who wouldn't? He was handsome, smart, had a good sense of humour, he was loyal... Well, Remus could go on all day about what he saw in him, but everyone agreed on Sirius Black having at least one good quality. Even some of the people that didn't like him.

He leaned into Sirius when the other man held him a little tighter, needing and loving the touch. It had been so long. And Sirius seemed almost the same as the last time they'd seen each other. Whether that was good or bad he didn't know, but he did know that it was reassuring. Partly because any bit of stability was appreciated and partly because it probably meant that Sirius still loved him in some way. Usually he didn't need much more than that.

He clung a on when Sirius moved, suddenly terrified that this had only been a momentary reprieve from sanity. But they were going into his room instead of Sirius leaving him again, so that was something. It didn't seem like he would be abandoned just yet. Probably later. Definitely later. Good things didn't last, especially for him.

When Sirius said it was all right, he shook his head in denial but didn't say anything. What was there to say? From either of them? Sirius apologising didn't help things, really. Who knew what he had had to go through to get back here, and yet Remus had punched him. He should be the one saying he was sorry.

"If you ever die again, I'm gonna kill you," he managed to say, sniffing. Which didn't make sense but it didn't have to.



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PostPosted: May 1st, 2017, 11:32 am 

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Sirius wasn't sure what do to do, not entirely equipped to deal with an emotional werewolf, but not about to pull away any time soon. He rubbed the taller man's back in hopes of soothing him as he murmured a few more apologies.

When Remus finally spoke, Sirius barked out a low laugh, pulling away his head to rest his face against his. "Duly noted, you old wolf."


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PostPosted: May 1st, 2017, 12:15 pm 

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"Good," Remus mumbled. Sirius had better know that he wasn't allowed to do anything like that ever again. He wasn't going to have any excuse to, though Remus would quite literally let him get away with murder. There were very few limitations but surely staying alive was a reasonable request. And honestly, it wasn't like either of them were likely to let each other out of sight for a while.

He closed his eyes, still coming to terms with it all. But Sirius was clearly real so that was something to start on. Everything else could be dealt with later. They could hide from it all for just a bit and he could have one damn hour of nothing going wrong. For once the universe could give him that.

"I was so fucking scared," he confessed, voice breaking. But the past was passed. He didn't have to be alone for just this little bit. Opening his eyes just long enough to check on Sirius, he kissed him, one hand fisting in the front of his shirt. He didn't want to take, didn't need to go farther than one kiss. What he was getting right now was far more than enough. He just needed a second to confirm that Sirius was really here, all other evidence aside.



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PostPosted: May 2nd, 2017, 10:20 pm 

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It wasn't often that Remus admitted fear, despite being more inclined to be sentimental than most others. Sirius was pretty sure that there were only a few things Remus was really afraid of and most of it was tied to his lycanthropy.

Sirius held him for a little longer at the admission and then nudged him in the direction of the couch. He was beyond tired, having only eaten what he found in the greenhouse, and then tea with Dumbledore during his interrogation.

"How long has it been? Albus didn't say, too caught up in my appearance. And Harry..wasn't very talkative.* To be completely truthful, he was a little shocked at his godson's reaction. Although he knew Harry certainly looked up to him, he knew they had missed time together, and a lot of the affection was one sided. However, clearly his reaction meant he felt more than he thought.


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PostPosted: May 2nd, 2017, 11:10 pm 

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Remus was definitely sentimental. He collected all sorts of knick knacks from his past with the Marauders and then definitely with Sirius. Sirius was the best thing in his life and Remus couldn't help but want to have tangible reminders of that. A lot of them had been lost, unfortunately, but at least he had the real thing back again.

He made a questioning little noise when Sirius nudged him. They were a little out of sync now, but at least the other man wasn't asking to leave yet. Remus was pretty sure he wouldn't be able to stand it if he did. But he twined his fingers with his lover's and settled in with him on the couch, more than happy to snuggle up to him as close as possible.

"Two hundred and seventeen days, and the ones I don't remember." Remus blinked back fresh tears and nuzzled into Sirius' chest. He could make sure that Sirius was safe here. Dumbledore wouldn't have bothered telling him if he hadn't intended to let them stay. The headmaster would know both of them would fight tooth and nail (literally) if anyone tried to do anything to the other.



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PostPosted: May 3rd, 2017, 12:16 am 

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Sirius' heart ached a little bit at the way Remus didn't seem to want to let go of him. He kicked off his boots, shrugging off his torn jacket and throwing it over to the floor since it needed to be thrown away. Then, he tugged Remus' longer body closer, pressing his face into his neck.

The answer honestly surprised him a little bit because time seemed much slower but he just nodded. Rubbing back the little hairs on his forehead, Sirius closed his eyes.


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PostPosted: May 3rd, 2017, 12:29 am 

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Remus was going to need permanent physical contact for several days. And Merlin forbid he wake up while Sirius was 'gone' in the bathroom. He simply held on as Sirius half undressed, refusing to let go in the slightest. Finally being able to settle down with him helped him relax a little. This was familiar and calming all at the same time. And he loved it as strongly as he'd missed Sirius.

He let out a shaky breath, taking a moment to try to start to sort out his emotional state. It was still complicated and he still wasn't sure where it was going to settle. But he did know that he held a fierce love for Sirius still, and was going to stay as close as possible for as long as he could. Once he made himself relax, his body started loosening on its own, especially since Sirius was touching him.

After a couple minutes, Remus let out a comforted little sound and burrowed into his lover. Clearly everything was going to be okay now that he was evidently going to stay with him for a while. "Do you need anything?" he asked quietly. If the answer was no, then there was more than half a chance that he would stay here until he fell asleep. Sirius had always helped even out his emotional state and get him to rest, even when it was a full moon week. Which it wasn't right now, fortunately, but they were almost into the third week of the month. That would be something he'd have to worry about soon.



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PostPosted: May 3rd, 2017, 10:42 am 

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Sirius waited with patience, rubbing his hand back and forth on Remus' head, and nuzzled his nose into his neck every so often. The thought of moving didn't cross his mind, even as he took off his filthy layers, so he was quite content to stay where they were while Remus settled into something calmer.

He smiled a little at the noise Remus made, reminiscent of his wolf form, which wasn't surprising. The very thing that Remus feared, having the wolf looming in the background, was one of the things Sirius loved most about him. He didn't love just any werewolf of course, but Remus was Remus, regardless of what form he was in. And Sirius knew that since they were kids.

The question made him snort, but he shrugged in response after a second. "Food, a bath, and a stiff drink? I can wait for them, though," he assured him. After a second, he wiggled under him so that he Remus' taller frame could fit between his legs. He always ran way hotter than most people which was greatly appreciated because ever since Azkaban Sirius abhorred the cold. "Merlin knows how long I'll stay awake otherwise."


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PostPosted: May 3rd, 2017, 5:16 pm 

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Just having Sirius here was amazing beyond belief. Remus could take anything as long as he stayed. The other man moving around didn't bother him since he could tell that he wasn't trying to get away. Getting comfortable was easy, even if Sirius kind of smelled. But he could get over that easily considering that it meant he was alive.

He missed the smile that Sirius gave, but he could tell that the other man was at least content for the time. That was all he needed. And even though Sirius was far more accepting of the werewolf thing than even Remus was, he knew that that blessing/curse was something that Sirius didn't hate about him. It was weird but he would take it.

At Sirius' snort, he made an inquisitive sound in lieu of asking anything verbally. He was about to make the unfortunate suggestion that he get up when the other man said he could wait, which settled that dilemma. Because he would be really, really okay with staying here a while. It was comfortable on the couch and it'd be warm pretty soon as well between the two of them. Remus was hotter but Sirius wasn't exactly cold himself.

The familiar position made him relax even more, and he sort of sprawled over Sirius like he used to. About forty percent of the time he would have been used as a mattress of sorts with the other man as the blanket, but otherwise they tended to snuggle like this. He liked it, too. If anything happened he'd be the one hurt. Plus he could burrow into the other man more.

Remus huffed a chuckle at Sirius saying he didn't know how long he'd stay awake. "Go ahead and sleep. You must be tired." He didn't know what had to have happened to him in the last seven and a half months but he'd bet it had been tiring. This was probably the first safe place he'd had to sleep in all this time. After a moment of considering, he reached up and scratched at Sirius' scalp behind his ear.



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PostPosted: May 3rd, 2017, 5:40 pm 

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Sirius usually let Remus flop on him like this in wolf form the most but sometimes they ended up like this as humans (or with as padfoot) too. The taller man was like a self heating blanket, despite being so skinny. Especially when the room was already warm to begin with.

"I'm okay-I can stay awa-" A yawn broke his sentence and he closed his eyes when the other man reached over to pet him. "Hmf. Not fair."


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PostPosted: May 3rd, 2017, 5:56 pm 

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Remus might've been a little bit proud of himself. "Stay what?" he asked with a grin, nuzzling his throat. Okay, so he was totally taking advantage of knowing where all of Sirius' itchy and sweet spots were. But he figured that the other man could use some downtime like that. Chances were both of their lives would get horrible sooner or later. Probably sooner.

"I'll keep you safe," he promised quietly. He scratched at the other's scalp a little, not even having to look to see to make sure he was getting the best spots. You didn't forget things like that. At this rate Sirius was going to be asleep within fifteen minutes but Remus could live with that. They'd have plenty of talking time later, though he intended to give Sirius a warm bath and healthy dinner before any of that happened.



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PostPosted: May 3rd, 2017, 6:23 pm 

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Honestly, he wasn't sure what he expected, not having bothered to check how long it had been since he'd fallen through the Veil (which is what Harry had just called it this morning, not that he knew the details, considering he'd never been inside the DOM before that except the first few rooms). Then again, he could have been gone for five minutes, and it was likely that Remus would have missed him. However, he wasn't sure that he'd have the same reaction with Harry, he reckoned.

He grumbled at his clearly amused grin and bit the soft scarred skin of his neck in retaliation. Moony was such a jerk, but before he could say so, he yawned again. And a few more times before he let out a frustrated sound and wiped at his teary eyes. "I know," he replied, cause there was nothing that could make him think otherwise. If there was anything that he knew by now it was that they had each other's backs. Despite what had happened regarding James and Lily.


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PostPosted: May 3rd, 2017, 8:06 pm 

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Remus made a breathy little noise when Sirius bit him. Well that was certainly adequate payback. He had always been easy when it came to that, or, well, anything regarding Sirius, really. And who could blame him? He was gorgeous and anybody would be lucky to have him. Remus had no idea what he was doing with a guy like him but he wasn't about to try to get him to change his mind or anything. That would just be stupid.

He snorted under his breath when Sirius yawned again, petting him and making a soothing noise when he sounded frustrated. "Tired?" he asked, trying to sound innocent. Which he most certainly did not, but the effort was there. Sort of, in a half-assed way. He gave a more heartfelt smile when Sirius acknowledged what he'd said about keeping him safe. It didn't surprise him that the other man still had faith in him, regardless of whether it was a good idea or not.

"I love you," he murmured, snuggling down and putting his arm over Sirius' waist. The pettings would have to stop for the moment but at least they could sleep comfortably. And Sirius had clear evidence that Remus was still very attached to him, apart from the initial punch. Which was explainable, honestly, since Remus wasn't at all sure that he hadn't been hallucinating or going mad or something. But this was nice, really nice, and Remus hoped it would last a while.



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PostPosted: May 3rd, 2017, 9:15 pm 

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He didn't really care to start anything but sufficed to say the two them weren't shy about things. They had gotten over their awkward phase as teenagers and it was far more likely that they would just laugh anything off at this point.

He grumbled at the redundant question, not bothering to say anything else, and just snuggled into the cushions. The admission did make him open his eyes though. He pressed a kiss against his temple. "Love you too, Moony."


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PostPosted: May 3rd, 2017, 9:32 pm 

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Sirius' grumbling was so familiar that for a second Remus felt like no time at all had passed. Like he'd just had some strangely hurtful and vivid dream, and his lover simply wanted him to go back to sleep. It hadn't been uncommon for one of them to wake the other in the night in the past, but generally the one being awoken sort of wanted to leave things until morning.

He made a pleased noise at the kiss, leaning into his touch however possible. It didn't take him long to start dozing off, still as close to Sirius as physically possible, which wasn't too hard. Once he actually closed his eyes, he was firmly asleep until he someone knocked at the door. The following flailing around (he suspected on both their parts) ended with him falling off the couch, but it wasn't like it hurt anything that hadn't already been hurting.

It turned out one of his students had been concerned about him missing class and had come to check on him. Remus was very touched by the thoughtfulness, even if he didn't particularly care for the timing. After promising that he was all right and thanking the kid for making sure, he went back to the couch and sat down on the edge, brushing Sirius' hair out of his face. "Do you want to move to the bed?" he suggested. "It'd be more comfortable." He should have thought of that in the first place but he'd been just a little preoccupied.



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PostPosted: May 4th, 2017, 3:08 pm 

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Sirius was beyond tired. Last night sleeping in the greenhouse was the first time he'd felt even a little safe to sleep properly but it was nothing compared to this. Before that, he couldn't remember falling asleep voluntarily, and only passing out when he was exhausted.

The knock did pull him out of sleep, but more importantly, it pulled away from a nightmare. He was in a world of fog, thick and cloying in his lungs. He flailed as if falling, knocking an elbow into the back of the couch, and narrowly missing Remus' face when he reared up at the same time as he did. He managed to grab the end of the couch and not fall but blinked sleepily at Remus who was sprawled on the floor.

"Alright?" He flopped back down, breathing heavy, and rubbed his chest as Remus went to open the door. Wiping crust out of his eyes, he sat up properly, and ran his hand over his hair with a sigh. When he came back, Sirius looked up, leaning into his touch. He wrinkled his nose at the thought of getting into bed like this. "I need a bath," he insisted. "Tired of being dirty." It just reminded him of Azkaban.


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PostPosted: May 4th, 2017, 4:44 pm 

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"All right," he answered Sirius. Well, his one hip kind of hurt a little, but that'd go away in a minute. It was just from hitting the floor so hard. Plus he was skinny so it wasn't like there was anything to cushion his bones or anything. Both of them needed to eat more, honestly, but Remus had a pretty high metabolism and he forgot to eat so he was skinny as hell. Especially recently with his recent bout of... not doing well.

He smiled a little at the way Sirius leaned into him. "I'll find you something to wear," he suggested. What he had could be modified to fit him, since unfortunately he hadn't kept many of his clothes. "And see if I can't get something brought up from the kitchen." He highly doubted that Sirius wanted to go eat in the hall with all the other students and teachers. Dumbledore would probably want to explain things first, too.

While he didn't invite the other man along, he kind of hoped that Sirius would follow him around as he went to rummage around in his trunk. He didn't bother with a robe, just trying to find something that didn't look like shit. There wasn't much. Remus was fairly careless about how he looked, so just about everything looked like it should have been in the trash bins already.

"Here," he offered Sirius, knowing the look of it would drive the other man mad.



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